I miss her more then anything. and it’s pretty fucking crazy how much different it is, from not talking to her for a day, to now. Knowing she’s not mine. I cry, all the fucking time, and it’s so fucking old already. Everytime I cry, I say it’s the last time, it’s not. I keep hoping she moves on,  at the same time.. I don’t.. kinda selfish? idunno.. all I know is this is so fucking hard. Why did I do this. because I was so scared to loose her? Well shit what a fucking idiot I am.. cause she’s gone. I want to call her, just to hear her voice, I wouldn’t say anything, because if I did, I’d just cry, some more. I can’t do this, I’m not strong enough to let her go. she.. was?????? my everything, my bestfriend. I told her shit that nobody else knows. I planned my future to be with her. Now??? I’m so fucking lost. I have no one to talk to, because it’s my problem no one elses. done for now….
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